www.ChangeLimitingBeliefs.com

HOW TO DO AN OPTION METHOD DIALOGUE WITH YOURSELF: THE CORE QUESTIONS

The first two things to find out are Feelings and the What (the situation). Identify and Clarify.

FEELINGS:

• Is there any way I’m feeling that I don’t like feeling? OR
• How am I feeling? OR
• What would I like to work on? OR
• How do I feel about that? (IF I’ve stated the problem—the“What”)

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FEELINGS:

• What am I (un-happy) about? (Always use your own words, i.e. sad, angry etc.)
• WHAT What about that involves feeling (un-happy)? OR
• What about that makes me feel (un-happy?) OR
• What about that is (angry-making, etc.)? Ask “What about that” 3 times
• What do I mean?
• What does that mean to me? OR
• Could I give an example? (If nothing specific is mentioned)

Be clear on the WHAT before moving to the WHY.

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FEELINGS: Why am I (un-happy) about that?

WHY (Use your exact feeling words)

• What do I mean?

What might I be concerned would happen if I weren’t (un-happy)?

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BELIEFS: Do I believe that?

• Why do I believe that? OR
• What seems true about that? OR

Do I know if that’s true? How do I know it’s true?

• What might I be concerned would happen if I didn’t believe that? OR
• Can I think of any way it might be bad for me if that belief were gone?

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CLARIFY: Can be asked anytime for clarification.

• What do I mean?
• What does that mean to me?
• Could I give an example?

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MAIN POINTS:

• Accept yourself
• Use your feeling words.
• Ask questions based on the last thing you said, but follow thread also.
• Ask respectful questions with sustained, innocent curiosity.

DESIRE: What do I want (instead)? Is there any reason to believe I can’t have that?